once in a while, she don't wanna call you


I only have phone pics to offer in this post... sorry for the dingy quality. (Check out my neapolitan ice cream hair situation from early this year, haha. One's bound to have misadventures every now and then when working with bleach.)

It's been a ruff and tuff year, oh man. Oh lordy. Ding dang dong, was it RUFF STUFF! Earlier I was making a list of positive things this year offered: televised musicals, Carly Rae Jepsen, trendy Nintendo apps, getting to know new friends and reconnecting with old ones, music I enjoyed. My therapist wants me to give more weight to the positive. I don't want to undervalue any of these things. They have kept me afloat, for sure.

"This has been the worst year of my life" is a phrase I'm trying to avoid fixating on right now, however apt and truthful it seems, because I know there have been rough times in the past, too. I've had pretty bad episodes before. Now that I am far away from those times, their gravity doesn't have a hold on me, and I can't remember every moment of angst. But I think it's okay to say "This was an excruciating year" and acknowledge that, and look forward to being disconnected from it.


My prayer for 2017 -- besides continuing to just survive, white-knuckled, teeth grit, eyes on the horizon -- is simply to make things... make use of my hands and brain and time.

However, to kick off the year, I'd like to just take a break from everything. I've been mostly absent on social media because of my shaky mental health (particularly since the election), and I know it has benefited me. So I feel like I would like to disconnect a little further and see how that treats me!

If I want to blog here or make videos or have an active presence on Twitter/Instagram, I will. But I'm taking it off my mental to-do list for a bit, if that makes sense. If you don't see me around for a stretch, I'm just on hiatus so I can take care of myself, okay? :)

Let's all have as productive and pleasant 2017 as we can!